More than the contest that my office mate and I have, I work harder because I feel that I slacked off too much in the past. I don't know but I still feel that I am the old happy-go-lucky me with no sense of responsibility. I do help with the bills at home but everything's just a cycle -- work 5 hours a day, earn this much, set aside payment for bills (think CC, postpaid telephone bill and electric bill) and spend everything left (which isn't that much) on shopping and allowance until the next pay day. I do plan on what and what not to buy but I'm not really good in following what's on the list so I sometimes end up asking allowance from my mom. After working for almost 2.5 years, I haven't saved anything yet, not a single peso and that made me feel even worse.
I feel that I can do more and push myself more without really feeling much burden on my part. Yes, I still complain and it's something that I can't change over night and I still think if it's worth it to work my ass out but I always end up telling myself that more than the rewards I will get out of this the learning in the process in getting it is what really matters. I realized that I should take my work more seriously and not just as something that I do everyday. I want to love the job that I have the way I loved it when I first got it. I guess in that way I won't feel tired waking up so early to go to work or extending after my 5 hour shift.OXOX